dansdansdans | Entries tagged with acting

I watched the PV. I am completely in love and I want to watch the movie nownownownow!!!

But I'm waiting to watch it with a friend on the 29th so I'll be staying away from spoilers until then. Probably the first time ever! XD

As for real life, we're working on a production which will be done in front of a test audience on wednesday and there's still some things left to do, but I think we can sort it all out. This week we've been writing scenes and trying them out on stage. :D It has been soooo nice to be able to be working with nothing but the production for the whole week and YEY! it's turning out really well and I'm crazy excited. This weekend I plan to get all my lines down so I won't have to have my script with me all the time and so that I won't panic on Monday when I realize that I'll need to get it down by Wednesday. XDDD
This is our first paid job and jdkshfdkjsaö excited! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

And today we had radio-ad-lib-acting. It's so much fun and in the end of November we'll be doing a real broadcast and it's just soooo much fun and yeah, I'm crazy excited!

The stress is getting better. I seem to handle it a bit better lately. I think it has a lot to do with us doing some actual artistic work and not all of that other organization stuff that we've been doing so much of lately. YEYYEY!

Also, I finished Pride yesterday, and I loved it! I do get a little O__o about all the talk of men are like this and women are like that, but I can kind of cope with it when it's jdramas. XDDD

I should sleep now, but I slept in the afternoon and ruined my sleeping schedule again. Fail. XD

Anyway. I'm going to watch some drama instead. :D

What?! Two updates in two days?! Now, what is this? XD

I'm home from school today. I keep waking up in the mornings feeling like shit and without having been able to sleep all night and I miss out on school and feel bad about it and even more stressed and it's all just a bad cycle. >__< I am so annoyed. XD

But, at least all of us in Teater Hysterica are at the same page now, and we realized that we can't work like we've been doing because we're gonna work ourselves into the ground if we keep going like this. It's just that there's so much to do with starting up a company and all the paper work that comes with that, and then there's also the work we've got that needs to be done somehow and with three days a week with actual school where we learn about running a company, and organisations and projects and what not and then there's only two days left for us to work on everything we need to do plus the artistic parts, so yeah. Under constant stress. XD I do feel like we're beginning to find our ways to not let the stress consume us, and I'm really thankful for that, but we're not close to there yet. Once we've started our company and sent in all those papers to everywhere, then things will settle down a little, I'm sure.

In other news we're having our housewarming party this Saturday. :D Ok, so we moved in in August, so a tad bit late, but it's really difficult to find a weekend that works for 9 people. XD

And I just can't wait for the album to come out. There's no chance for me buy it for a few months, and it HUUUURTS but I will buy it when I can afford it and until then, there will be shiny dls! XDDD And jfidöghls tour! I really haven't flailed about anything since I've been so absent! But OMG I'm so excited! Of course it hurts not to being able to go to the cons, but at least there are cons and it's their 2nd countdown in Osaka and there surely will be a lovely DVD of it and fancams and lovely goods and jfksldhfkjdsöa *__________________________*
And there is Maru!drama!!! *________* I love him in dramas and he should be in them more and there's also Nino and that should be fun! I haven't watched anything with Nino in it since I watched Stand Up! ages ago. :D :D :D :D

Speaking of dramas. I've been all kinds of obsessed with Kimura lately because ehum. How can you not? And I watched this lovely drama called "Sora Kara Furu Ichioku no Hoshi" and I loved it. It was really dark and it made me go all T_______T loads of times. But I also really, really enjoyed it. Kimura is hot like a jfkdshföjsdöka and there is something about him. It's not strange that he's as popular as he is because my god! *_____*
So, a question. Have you, dear f-list, watched any dramas with Kimutaku, and if you have, recommendations?!

Me and M have decided to see each other once a month now to have fangirling weekends of awesome! We're meeting up on the 29th-30th and we're watching Pacchi, Long Vacation (kimutaku), kiswak (our short for korean version of it started with a kiss), and something more.. Don't remember, but yet another drama.. That I was supposed to dl. What was it?! XDDD
But yeah, I'm excited! I'm in a drama-frenzy right now and the two of us came into Johnny's through dramas, and there is just soo so so so much to watch. :D :D :D YEAH!

Ok. I have things to do for Japanese class. Nothing really difficult, but I'm so behind so I keep putting it off. XD

See you~

I keep failing at updating and I blame it all on school. I got so much to do all the time, and when I don't I have no energy for anything. There is so much floating around in my head right now.

Anyhow, school started in the 16th and the first week was mostly introduction and stuff. We also got computers from school so now I have two laptops! XD We already had loads of meetings with our group the first week and it keeps getting more and more busy. But we do have a name now. We're Theater Hysterica. I love the name to no end and it's a name that stands out so.. ♥
Last week was also the last week of my vampire summer course and I kept procrastinating and wrote the paper on Sunday and it was finished about an hour before it needed to be handed in. Also there was some friend who went to the same school as us visiting last weekend so there was people everywhere. XD

This week has been full of meeeeetiiiiiiings! So we're doing a project for "the culture nights" in two different cities. And we worked out an idea of putting up a big, blank canvas in a park together with brushes and paint and ask people to paint whatever they want and then about one hour before our performance the five of us in Hysterica and two musicians will go there and look at the painting (that hopefully won't be all white) and talk about the impressions we get from it and then create a performance of it. It's all improvisation and really, really scary, but it can also be really, really great. The first performance will be on the 18th, and I already had plans with my family, so I won't be there and it really hurts!! >__< But I'll be there on the 24th.
But there is loads and loads of stuff to do before that, and we only have three weeks left to do it. I'm in charge of getting the permission to perform and stuff and I really hope it'll all be smooth because if not we might end up not being able to finish the project. But it's all exciting!

Aside for that project we have classes about buisness and time and communication and inbetween all of that we're having meetings. Next week will send in our registration of our company and then it'll take a few weeks before we're all registered and actually have a company. But OH MY GOD SCAAAAARYYYYYY! XD But we need to get it done soon because in November we're doing forumtheatre for people in college that will be filmed and used at Uppsala uni in class and for research. The theme is genus and it'll be really interesting to start working with it once we have had our meetings with the uni.

And also our teacher from actingclass want us in a cabaret that will have it's premiere on New Year's Eve and then be played 10 weekends afterward. Henry, our old teacher, will direct us, but we will write the numbers for it. It's all really exciting, even though I'm a little sad not to celebrate New Year's with my old friends as usual. XD

Also there is this place called Nya Lapphyttan, which is a recreation of a medieval blast furnace (?), actually of one of the oldest in the world and they want us to present some ideas for maybe dramatized guidings or big productions at the sights and stuff. It feels so crazy, because we already have three offers for work and we've been here for two weeks! XDD I'm so excited and going this entrepreneur course gives us the opportunity to learn about everything having to do with owning a company and to make a name of our group so we can work with what we love full time. I'm very optimistic right now! :D
But there is nothing but meetings and planning going on right now and my head is soooo tired of just thinking. XDDD Finally we have 1,5 hours of ACTING next Friday. XD We need it right now! :D

Right now I'm on a train going to see my boyfriend and then tomorrow his mother has her birthday-party-thingie. She's turning 50. And I'll meet all the relatives for the first time and I reeeaaaally don't want to! >__< But I'm sure they're all nice and that they will like me and all that. . . . . Right? XD

Starting Monday I've decided to keep up with LJ properly. I'll even write it up in my schedule! XDDD

Oh! One more thing, next week my distance japanese lessons will start. I had a look at the book the other day, which I thankfully was able to dl instead of buying, and it's like, the basics of the basics and waaay to easy for me at this point. But oh well. I think that's good so that I won't be slumped with work from that too. XD

OK. So over to some Eito! If you don't want spoilers, don't click! XD
( EITO I LOVE YOU! )

I was planning to do the eitomeme and the other meme I've seen around lately now too, but this is getting really long and I need to finish some things for school before the train arrives in Linköping.

I hope you all will have a lovely weekend! ♥

First thing first, Hi New friends! I fail for making new friends and then not posting a thing! XDDD

Anyway, I'm Therese, 24 years old, Swedish.. I've been studying acting for a while and now me and some people from my class are starting up a theatre group and we've rented a house to stay in beginning this fall and it will be all kinds of awesome and we'll be doing great things. :D We're going to be studying at the same time, a culture entrepreneur-thingie to help us start our business and deal with money and apply for money and things like that. So that's my plans for the future.
As for now I'm having a summer break, and instead of working I'm studying some courses on distance at different universities. One is about Buddhism and stuff, haven't started that one yet. And the other one is about vampires!!! I have to read and watch Twilight, but other than that, it's awesome!! I've read Dracula and watched Coppola's movie and now I'm ugh, reading Twilight and yeah.
Enough, so, my journal is all about eito and whining about my life. XD I have been really bad at updating for a while since we were working day and night for our premieres at school. But now I'm planning to update and be around loads more. :D
Oh, and if there's anything you want to ask me, just go ahead! :D

Anyways, I missed a few day of the meme, so, have a few at the same time! :D

day 01 - Favorite Kanjani8 song
day 02 - A rumor about any of the members that left you an impression
day 03 - A Yoko picture you can't take your eyes off
day 04 - Favorite song cover (sung by any member)
day 05 - Favorite Janiben Moment
day 06 - Favorite Member Engrish day 07 - Quote from a Non-Single Song (Album and B-side only)
day 08 - A Ryo picture you can’t take your eyes off day 09 - Favorite Kanjani 8 PV
day 10 - A Hina picture you can't take your eyes off
day 11 - A Kanjani 8 member moment that makes you laugh your ass off
day 12 - Member/s wearing the Wackiest outfit you’ve ever seen
day 13 - Favorite Kanpani Moment
day 14 - A dream you had with a Kanjani 8 member, in great detail
day 15 - Favorite Kanjani 8 Quote (except from songs)
day 16 - An Okura picture you can’t take your eyes off
day 17 - The first Kanjani 8-related drama you thought of the moment you read this
day 18 - Fave OTP or Member-Ai moment
day 19 - A Maru pic you can’t take your eyes off
day 20 - A Fanwork (made by you or others)
day 21 - A picture of your Kanjani 8 Stuff
day 22 - Whatever tickles your fancy
day 23 - Chibi Kanjani 8 picture
day 24 - A Subaru picture you can’t take your eyes off
day 25 - Favorite Kanjani 8 Solo
day 26 - Favorite Concert DVD
day 27 - A Yasu pic you can’t take your eyes off
day 28 - Favorite Live Performance
day 29 - Favorite Group photo
day 30 - Whatever tickles your fancy

( day 04 )

( day 05 )

( day 06 )

( day 08 )

Hm. I just realized I have accidentally put out nr 7, but oh well. Too lazy to fix it now. Will do day 08 tomorrow. :D

I should go sleep now. XD

BUT FIRST!!!! GIVE ME PROPER PROMO OF THE PV AND THAT THING WHEN THEY WEAR SUITS AND KFLDDÖJSKDLÖSJFDSAÄDKLASJFKLDSJAKFLÖJDAKLÄJGKLÄFDJGKFÄLDJAGÄLKJGKDFÖLJAGFDSJKÖ I DIIIIIEEEEEEEE! *_____________*

So, how are all of you? I'm being quite busy, but not too awful yet. XD

I had two great weeks in Germany, first one week with my fangirl friends in both Münich and Berlin. We watched the countdown DVD and it was sooooo nice to fangirl together with someone again! :D

And then I had one week in Berlin with my school and it was awesome. Loads of lovely bars and clubs and restaurants and yeah, I'm in love with Berlin and someday I'll be living there. :D :D :D

School is being fun but a bit stressful. Our final oroductions premiere's on the 20th, so in 12 days we have to nail all 34 scenes, we have 10 done for now, and it takes time, because we have no actual script yet, just a synopsis that we have written and then we get up and improvise/get text shouted at us from our teacher, and yeah, it takes time. We have no props or costumes yet, and we haven't really talked about what we need. At least we decided on not having a bathtub on stage, which we wanted first. :P
Starting next week, rehearsals will be held in Risbergs Vekstad, where we will perform it later, which means going from here at 8 in the morning to be there at 9 and then going back from there at 21.00. So yeah, home at 22.00 every day next week. YEY! XD

I'm sitting here waiting for an announcement of summer cons. What's with eito and all their hinting? Can't they just tell us and give us the dates so us poor overseas fans can start planning. I just NEED to go there if there's a tour. But the only way to do it is to go there to study and take study loans. haha. I fail I know, but I really just can't miss out on yet another tour and well.. Let it be when I can actually go pleeeeaaaaase!!!!

Uhm. Ok. We're having rehearsals in two hours and I need to get stuff done before that.

Hope all of you are doing fine, my sporadic commenting I fear won't get any better than just that for a while, but, bare with me? XDD

So, we're a few people from our class who has been talking about starting up a acting collective next year. We will start a free acting group and make our own productions and yeah, stuff like that. We're planning to be set in Norberg, which is where this school is moving next year, and we're hoping to work with them too, since our teacher have plans for a "third year" or what to call it.
And we had this woman here today who talked about financing and stuff and it was such an inspiration to talk to her, since she's been working with it before and it makes one understand that it's not impossible. It's a lot of hard work and all, but it's definitely doable. And it feels great to have a plan for next year, since I don't know what I'd be doing otherwise. So. We'll sit down and talk about some things we need to work out. Such as where to live and searching for houses and such. :D I am happy!

Also we're having this week for working with our own plays that we're doing. I haven't really written much yet, but I'm working on it and I think I might actually end up writing a play! But it's difficult. I have never written anything for the stage and it's difficult to know how to do to make it interesting to watch. I'm also in one play that a classmate has written, so I'll be working with that too. Probably a lot of work this week then.
My boyfriend is coming on Wednesday. I'm a bit worried about having the discipline to do what I'm supposed to do and not cuddle with him instead. haha.

In other news, I've bought some stuff on tradera, the Swedish equivalent of Ebay. I'll soon get a pair of light pink winter shoes and this beanie- and muffler in one-thingie. :D I am happyface. I'm also waiting for goods from the summer tour and the countdown! This will be a very good month with lots of shinies! :D Oh! And my GIFT singles that I got as a Christmas gift from my boyfriend has come home to him now, can't wait to have them here! *______*

Also, I wrote this in my last post. But I'm doing the voice meme and uhm, tell me something you want me to talk about or whatever and I'll record it! :D

Yey! I can has two updates in less than a week! :D Guess who's returning more and more to LJ?! :D

One more thing. I just watched You're Beautiful a kdrama that I absolutely loved, and I'm wondering if you might have some tips on something similar to that to watch? I love those kind of dramas. I've watched jdramas, twdramas and a few kdramas (3 XD) but I can watch whatever as long as it's good. So.. Tips? :D

Now I need to go sleep. I slept less than two hours last night and yeah. Sleep deprived!

Oh, one more thing. This is to the part of my flist being in Japan... I'm asking this question here as to not making anyone do stuff they don't want to because I'm pestering them.. But.. There is new really shiny shop photos out now. With loads of Yasuba and... If someone is going to the Johnny's shop and would be willing to buy for me... Let me know?
Ok. I feel like such a bad person. This is just a question, so you people living in Japan, don't feel like you have to or anything!

Ok. Now I sleep. XD

Hi dears! :D

And hi new friend! I hope we'll get to know each other! :D

So school has started again and it started with me being sick for two days, when we had a guest teacher here. Very annoying. >_< But oh well.

This next week will be all about our own pojects. We're all supposed to have written a about 30 minutes long play and we'll have time to work with them this week. Unfortunately. Mine is not written yet. ehum. I have done nothing about it this weekend. Mainly because I've been sick, but also because I've been watching this kdrama called You're beautiful that

moka_n_waffles wrote about in her LJ which made me want to watch it right away. I started Friday and was done yesterday. 16 episodes all over 1 hour long. haha. That's a good way to spend your weekend. :D

Now I'm watching They Kiss Again, which is a sequel to the twdrama It Started With A Kiss, which I love and I've been meaning to watch TKA since it started airing back in 2008. XD Anyways, I'm very excited. :D

Oh, I have a question to my flist, does anyone have a good program to rip videos off youtube? I have something called free download manager, which I love, but ripping from youtube does not work anymore and I want all the new shiny fancams so so so bad! *____*

I also want to do some memes that's been around lately. This one I stole from

chimericalyours. ♥

Leave me a comment saying "Oh Ryo!" and I will:
1. Tell you why I friended you.
2. Associate you with something - fandom, song, color, photo, word, ETC.
3. Tell you something I like about you.
4. Tell you a memory I have of you.
5. Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.
6. Tell you my favorite user pic of yours.
7. In return, you must post this in your lj.

And this one from

chimericalyours and

la_soffitta

Voice Post!
In a comment, tell me anything you'd like me to say, read out, sing or.. well.. I'll record and upload the whole thing (and try not to fail too much in the process)
Please don't ask me to sing though? XD

Ok. Now onto the meaning of this post. I wanted to post some pictures of the productions we've been doing in school so far. :D

Our first project was a cabaret to be shown in Risbergs Verkstad which is this old lovely industrial building that Henry (or teacher) has bought and made into a place to hold parties, give performances like ours and so far.
We worked in several different groups and improvised and wrote stuff for the cabaret and picked out the things we really liked. It turned into a 80-90 minutes (plus break) long performance. We had food and stuff before and then bar and some musicians playing afterward and it was all a big success. :D I also sang in front of people for the first time in ages. Sadly the pics I have aren't too great, but oh well.

( Cabaret pics )

The next project we had, which we started with right after school started but that we had more time to work with around November. I did a monologue from a script by a Swedish scriptwriter named Isa Schöier, the play is called Sleeping Beauti Airlines and my role was "the daughter". There wasn't a real monologue, at least not a 20-30 minutes long one, but I copied and pasted all of her lines and made my own monologue from that. I spent a lot of time on this. We directed ourselves with a guestteacher as an eye who came with tips, but didn't do any directing herself, and I'm very very proud of this one.

( Monologue pics )

And our latest production was an absurd play. We had this huge stage with newspapers all over the floor, condoms and vinyl gloves filled with paint in the ceiling, six bunk-beds and one single bed and we were all dressed in white. We were divided into four groups and we all had a script each that we took three parts from and did every part in between other groups parts, and there was dance, and lots of great things. I loved this so much, we worked on it practical for about two weeks. Which meant real hard work and late nights. So, some pics?

( Absurd theater )

In two weeks we're gonna start on a new project, which is two plays with 7 people in each that we're going to tour with for a week in Finland. :D I'm looking forward to that! It's my neighboring country but I have never been to Finland. So yey. :D

Creds to those of you who had the stamina to get all the way down here.
haha. I need to update more frequently. XD

Bai!

It's already a few days into 2010 now but I really want to go through this year a little and just, think about what have happened and stuff. So yeah. This is my 2009! :D

( 2009 was... )

For this year I don't know what's coming for me. Some of my friends at school have talked about starting a acting group after school. I don't know if that'll happen, but I'm hoping for it. I still have another school to audition for. Which I need to start thinking about.. I just.. Don't have the spark for it right now. >_< Otherwise.. I just don't know what's going to happen to me after school is over in May. We'll see about that.
What I do know is that we're gonna tour in Finland for a week in February and that I'm going to Germany to see my friends during spring break to later meet up with my class in Berlin. :D So some good times ahead. :D

I hope 2010 have some good things in stall for me. I want to develop as an actress and as a person and I want to meet interesting people and do interesting stuff.
Oh and I want to develop a sense for moneysaving. XD
I also have some resolutions. First: Quit smoking. I started again and I do want to quit. So I'm doing a cut-down in January to be completely smokefree in February. 2nd, loose some weight. I've ganed so much since coming back from Japan ~~and eating more than one meal a day~~ and I want to loose some of it because yeah, I look pregnant. 3rd I will only eat ecological meat from now on. That's the only way to guarantee that the meat I'm eating comes from animals that have been treated in an humane way, and also to ensure that I don't eat meat from animals that have been given crazy loads of antibiotics "just in case" and therefor have a lot of multi resistant bacterias and stuff in them. So yeah. I'll eat the vegetarian food at school and I'll only be buying ecological meat. Which is super-expensive, but since I only have to cook two days a week, I can afford it. XD

Ok. Longest post in like, forever. XD

I hope all you lovely people will have a great 2010 and that we'll be able to talk a lot more than I have been able to the last six months or so.
♥

School is being not hectic at the moment, but it's stressing me out since we have our Absurd Theatre-thingie on the 16th and we have barely begun just yet. The last week before the premiere will probably crazy, and it will make me even happier to have a break. I really love what we're doing, all of it. But we're having so many productions all the time with three weeks tops to work on it before the premieres so it's a lot of pressure, and with the pressure of all the auditions for schools on top it really have gotten a little much.

So yeah, three weeks break will be great. I'll need to work on two monologues for yet another audition in January and write a script for my own project in school, so maybe I won't have as much freetime as I would like, but still. I'm looking forward to everything with Christmas. I've promised myself to not work with stuff up until New Years. YAY! I just have to make sure that I'll do things properly once in 2010. XD

How are all of you?

I've been really bad at commenting lately. I do read, but I just fail to comment. Bad LJ friend. XD

I will try to be more online once the break has come. And yeah, it'll probably happen too, since I don't have anything else planned. XD

I'm so happy about the new singles!!!! I have no idea how I'm going to afford them, but I thought about asking my parents for them as a Christmas gift. :D

Also there will be shiny goods and I want them so so so so so bad! *____* Problem is again money and the prices all sellers are taking for it. So yeah. I guess I'll just have to wait and hope to find them next time I'm in Japan. Whenever that is. T___T

In other news, the absurd theatre thing we're doing now will be so much fun. The stage will be six bunk-beds and one single bed, all walls white and we'll be having paint on stage so that we can paint ourselves and everything around us in colours! *___* It will look so damn awesome!
Me, and the three people in my group will also be masturbating and having sex on stage. Of course only acting it, so no nakedness and stuff but yeah. It will be awesome! But difficult to do without laughing in the beginning. It's really hard to have someone on top of you simulating sex with without starting to giggle. XD

Also! Somebody wants some christmascard/letter/whatever in the mail? Send me your address and I'll send you something? ♥

Hi guys! :D

How are you all doing? I miss you. I swear that I'll be more online from now on.

We're doing our monologues this week. The first four tonight, and then five tomorrow and five on Thursday. I'm on Thursday. I'm really really looking forward to it. We've been working on this since the end of August and now it's finally time for us to perform. :D

On Monday I have an audition for an acting school in Stockholm. I'm learning two monologues right now.. I hope I'll get it down soon so that I can decide on how to perform it. And then I have to decide what part of this monologue I'm going to use. It's 20 minutes and the test monologues should be 3. So there's some deciding to do.

I'm really looking forward to this audition. I'm not nervous yet, but I guess I will be. What makes me excited is that my confidence is on some kind of top at the moment, and that's what I need right now. XD The chance of getting in are minimal though, since theres about 1500 people applying and they take in 10, but yeah. I'll do my best and hope for the better! :D

I'm also meeting

luin_lote this weekend and I'm so looking forward to it. I haven't seen her for soooo long now! I've met her once since we came back from Japan, and that was only for an hour or so. Now we'll have a weekend of fangirling and just, catching up. I'll also see her new apartment which I'm dying to see. :D:D:D:D

And klfsdjfksdhafjködsjaö I LOVE EITO! The PV is so much amazing I just want to squeeze them all! The hair is amazingly fugly and I love love love love it! Also, as soon as I get money I'll be all over Yahoo auctions for that red guitar. :D

Also OMG it's soon Christmas!!!!!! &hearts; I love Christmas, and even though we had a very nice Christmas Eve in Japan last year, I'm looking forward to celebrating it at home this time.
Yesterday I downloaded about 10 GB of Christmas songws. XD Yes, I'm a sucker for Christmas. &hearts;

We had our first snow last week. It snowed for almost two days, but it wouldn't stay on the ground until the evening on the 2nd day, and then when I woke up in the morning it was gone again. >_< We need our snow here. It's so damn dark and everything now. I'm looking forward to having some real snow though.
When in school in Japan, there was this girl from Mexico who was so excited about the snow one day, because it was the first snow she had ever seen. I just found it so sad that the first snow for her was the rainsnow of Tokyo. XD

YEY! CHRISTMAS! :D

Ok. I know I'm getting a bit overexcited a bit too early but I love love love love it! And the food! And the candy! And the presents! :D :D :D :D

Yeah. I'll stop rambling now. XD

So yeah. I'm having the time to be online more and what happens? My computer can't log onto the internet because we have my brother's router which have this strange password that he onlyu had on a tiny note that is now lost. GRRR! I have to use our desktop instead of my lovely shiny computer, and it seems to hate LJ. >_<

Also I'm dealing with a lot of thoughts right now.. So I went to the audition thingie and well. It was in two parts, one group improvisation with 4 other, we got a circumstance and 30 minutes to work on it before we got infront of the jury. I was so bad. A lot of insecurities and also a way of acting I'm not fond of. I love impro, but this was more like hello! look at me! ME ME ME! and the whole thing about seeing what happens around you just disappeared and in that I guess my confidence disappeared too. I just didn't take all that space I should have to be noticed and yeah. Fail.

After that was the mono0logues. A monologue of two minutes, nothing more. I had thought it was three, because that's what the other schools have. But nono. And I got all, OMG I need to shorten it with one minute and blabla. I also took out some parts and put in some others, since I used the monologue I'm working with in school, which is 15-20 minutes long.
I don't remember the last time I was as nervous as when I was waiting outside for my turn. Butterflies from toes to head and I was shaking a little and like.. yeah.. So nervous.
The good thing was that all of that just disappeared once on stage doing my monologue. Which was shorter than I thought, I was sure they were going to stop me before I had the time to end it, since they were really strict on the 2 minutes sharp-thingie. They didn't. And it felt really good.. Then there was the lunchbreak from 12 to 13.30. >_< After that the judges had decided which ones they wanted to see in the next round. To sit there and wait for that damn list to come up. Not fun. And then my name wasn't on it, and eventhough I suspected it, with the impro going real bad, I still felt that the monologue was good and I had a chance.. So yeah.. Still, people getting in on their first try is very rare.. Most people apply 8-10 times before getting in (if they ever).. But still.. It's so damn easy to start feeling down and doubting your own abilities.
Which I just can't when trying to become and actress. There is no room for that, because I will get noes all the time, and maybe here and there a yes, but the buisness is rough and I need to be able to handle that.

Oh well. My next thing is in Stockholm in little more than two weeks. I need to learn two more monologues until then and just hope for the best.. I just really need to prepare for this. I don't want to go there feeling I haven't worked on it properly. XD

Ugh.

IDK. Right now I'm feeling quite down. Not really because of the audition, but because I'm having all these OH GOD WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH MY LIFE?!!!!!-thoughts right now. I have this year planned out, but then?? I need to have some sort of plan. Ugh. I'll deal with that later.. I'm just far too up-tight right now.

In funnier news our class did a cabaret a few weeks ago. It was really stressful, because the preparing time was short, but it turned out really great and it was such a kick to do it. There was this one little sketch that I had problems with when rehearsing that was great doing once we were up for real. All my insecurities disappear when it's the real thing, because I don't want to get up on stage to do some half-assed thing when I know I have much more to give.
Also I sang on stage for the first time in ages. It was fun. :D

Tomorrow I'll be meeting some friends in their new apartment and spending time with my dad, since mum is doing something with some friends.

It's nice being home a little. And I love to cuddle with my cat and my dog. My cat has gotten really fat lately though. Not healthy for her but well, she eats like a horse. XD

Ok. Enough of me really. HOW ARE YOU LOVELY PEOPLE? ♥

Ok. First things first.

I fail and being late, but anyways.

Happy belated Birthday

elyndys ♥
I hope you had a shiny birthday with loads of great gifts and yummy things to eat and other things one should have at ones birthday. :D
Here, have some cutem young Subaru. :D

So, I survived last week's crazy schedule, barely, but I did. XD Now we're working with light, and our big monologue projects are starting tomorrow. I'm looking forward to it so much! I found this play I want to take the monologue from. Problem is, there is no as long as required monologues in it. So I'm in the middle of putting it together to fit. I already have an idea of what I want to do with it, which feels great. :D

Today we had our own monologues in the cellar. I was without a good idea of what to do until 12-1 o'clock last night. Stayed up too late thinking about it, and I didn't have the time to really try it out for myself in the cellar before we were supposed to show it to everyone. But it all went really well and I'm very pleased with how it turned out. And I love when the feelings just comes, I wanted to cry on stage, and I did without having to fake it. YAY! XD

The rest of the day I went home to sleep. I'm still sick. Or, I was fine, except for a little coughing for a day or two but now my throat hurts like hell and I'm having a bad headache. I'm going to take an aspirin and then go to bed in a little while and hope that it will all pass by tomorrow. I don't want to be sick anymore. It's making working in school so much harder. I don't have the energy to move as much as required when in acting class. GRR!

Oh well.

I still love school though! :D Am so excited about these monologues. I just want to dig into it right away! I just hope that we will have the opportunity to work on it without getting too many other projects to work on too. Our teacher seems to like to give us shitloads of assignments all at once.
Well, I do have my own play to write too.... Hm. I haven't done a thing on that one. I know the theme for it, but that's all and I think we're supposed to have at least a synopsis done in two weeks or something, and then the script done in another two-three weeks. ehum. I better get a move on then. XD

I'm just babbling again. I really should just go to bed now.

Nightienight~ ♥

I was supposed to say this in my post yesterday, but I got a little carried away with all my eito love so I forgot.. XD So,
Hi new friends! :D

Since I don't think I've ever done one, I thought of making a little introduction post. :D

I'm Therese, as I think you've guessed. XD I'm 23, from Sweden. The past year or so, I've been in Japan two times, six months each time, studying Japanese. It was awesome, and I love the country (even though I've barely been out of Tokyo.. FAIL!) and would love to get back there. Soon.

But now I've just moved and started a new school. I study acting and I want to become an actress. I have only one passion as big as my passion for eito and that is acting. I've only been doing stage acting, and that's what I think I want to do in the future too, but since I haven't tried film, I don't know for sure. I guess the perfect thing would be both. I'm going to apply for the most prominent acting schools in Sweden next year, you'll probably see me angst about it a lot here. XD

As for fangirling, I used to be a NEWS and KAT-TUN fangirl too, but I kinda.. left that. Eito just.. took over. I still like all of the Johnny's groups, some more than others, but the only ones I really love is eito. ♥ My favourite member is Subaru. He turns me into a puddle on the floor most of the time. But I of course love all of eito and my favs after him is floating all the time. I'm also a collector and my need to have everything when it comes to goods and stuff is.. not good for my wallet but very good for me. XD

I also love Japanese and Taiwanese dramas, be it with or without our boys. Sadly I don't watch as much as I used to. My time seem to never be enough, even though I spend so much time just doing nothing. To name a few favs; Last Friends, Nodame Cantabile, It started With A Kiss, Devil Beside You, Hana Yori Dango, Mars... And so on.

Um. I don't know what more to write.. So, if you have any questions just ask! :D

Now to something different. XD
We had the introduction for our monologues today. I was a bit shocked when she told us that she wanted us to have monologues of 15-20 minutes!! That's a lot of text to memorize, and with no sticks from someone elses lines to learn from. XD I do think I know which monologue to have though, since a girl in my class found one of my favourite scripts I've ever read today and she told me I could have it since she found other stuff she was interested in also. I haven't decided yet, but I have a few ideas with that one. I'm thinking of just using the monologue, without the rest of the play in mind. The character in the play is actually a man, and I want to do it as a woman and probably having her talk about his father. If only reading the monologue, you can get thoughts on incest and stuff, and I'm thinking of trying that. It's interesting how a text put out from it's context can become something completely different and I want to explore that. I already have a few thoughts on things to use and such and yeah. It feels good! :D

We're also doing a monologue in a cellar in one of the houses next Thursday, which we're doing all by ourselves with our own ideas. So no scripts or anything like that. All we have is that it should take about 5 minutes and that we should have a song in it.

Tomorrow we're having a workshop in burlesque, which will be interesting and fun, even though I'm not sure what we will do. I just hope that we won't take our clothes off. haaah. XD

So yeah, there's a lot of things going on and now I need to read some scripts because I'm supposed to have like 3-4 pages from a play with 3-4 characters in it to hand to the teacher tomorrow and then we'll work with those texts one day or another. ehum. Good going girl! I've known that we were supposed to do this for at least a week now, and I still haven't looked it up. GAH! I need to stop doing that. Tomorrow I will start working seriously on the cellar monologue, and then Friday my boyfriend is coming, so the weekend will be off, but then I have to start up on Monday with that one again, and I also need to start looking at some other scripts for the long monologue just in case, so I know that I have explored all possibilities there. I need to get myself a calendar where I can give myself deadlines, because really, this is so not working if I'll keep this up this whole year. All of our projects demands so much discipline and work on my own, so yeah. Work work work!

heeeh. Long post is long. XD

Guess what came with the mail today? A letter from the school I applyed for. Saying that I GOT ACCEPTED! So, this fall I'll be moving to Bergslagen, somewhere in the middle of Sweden, in the woods, to study acting again!! I AM SO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!

I'll be acting again at the one school I really wanted to get in to!!!!

klfdshjfkdshlgafdiusöjfdlksjfögdlkhjkdhgiofdjövdoikdoapäjdiöahgöfdsaz

TODAY IS A HAPPY DAY! ♥

I printed out my application paper for the school I want to go to. I need to copy some papers, mail people I'd like to write down as references and write a personal letter. Those letters. I always angst so much about them. Last time I think I rewrote it like 8 times. I did get called to a lot of interviews and auditions thanks to it though.

And now I'm filled with fear again.
If i do this, if I apply and get in to this school I can't back out. If I get in I have to really commit myself and above all, I need to believe in myself and in my ability. That's really were the problem lies. I have such problems believing in myself, believing that I'm good enough. I hate this feeling. I'm not an insecure person per say, I'm confident in myself, who I am as a person. But this damn fear of failing the only thing I really really want is making me doubt myself so much. It's just, if I wont be able to pull this off, if I won't be able to become an actress, how will I pick myself up afterwards? What will I do? What else can I see myself doing? The sad thing is, there's nothing else. Nothing. It's dangerous to think this was, this or nothing. But I honestly can't see myself doing anything else.

Can someone just make all these thoughts disappear? X___X

Officially the best Subaru pic of the year!

( Under a cut so you who do not wish to be spoiled wont. )

The calendar in all is just soooo shiny! *_______________* I WANT IT NOW! Stupid money.

On another note I looked through some old pictures today. I miss acting so much!
I mean where else do a whole bunch of people stand staring at someone stomach for ages?

( Acting, why I miss it and pictures from our play. )

14 days left in Japan. Or, technically, 13 now. Oh God. That feels weird. I need to start cleaning out a little next week, since my friend is here the last week and I don't want to spend too much time at home, cleaning when she's here.

Ah~ Long entry is long.
Should go sleep now. XDDD

Lately I've been in this really good mood. It could have something to do with the fact that I'm going to see Subaru Friday and Saturday. ^______^

But also, I don't know. Right now everything just feels nice.
I have found something to do once I get back to Sweden that really feels right in every kind of way. I just hope that I'll get accepted to the school.
It feels like everything is just finally settling down a little somehow.
I've been so afraid to deal with things like what to do with my future and my dreams. Because the only reason really, to not pursue my dream of becoming an actress is that I'm so afraid to fail that I barely dare to try. But I do love it so much, and it's time for me to stop being so damn afraid of everything and start believing in myself and my own ability and my own talent. I am good at acting, hell, it might be the only thing that I'm really good at. So why not?

So. On to another topic. Today the student visa holders at my school went to some trip, and the ones that didn't have a visa and didn't want to spend 10 000 yen on that trip, stayed in Tokyo to make udon.
It was fun. I worked with two Swedes and one from somewhere else, don't really remember. And one of the Swedes was the one in my class I don't really like. But he can be quite funny sometimes, in a Swedish kind of way, I realized today.
Walking on dough is strange.
The udon ended up being, well fine, but not the greatest thing I've eaten in my life. But oh well. It was fun making anyways. And we had this guy at the same table, but in the other group who was really competitive and that kind of brought out the competer in me. ^^;;;

I hate when people bid at auctions one minute before it's supposed to end and it gets prolonged with another 10 and then they do it again and again. >_< But, at the end of it, I won! YEY! Arena ticket!! ♥

The other day, Suzuki-san, the guy that has helped me with the tickets, went to IKEA and came home with omiyage for me; a bottle of red wine. Strange that they sell French wine at the Swedish food-corner in IKEA. But oh well. I'm happy. Haven't had even a glass of wine since I got here. So now I'm celebrating my tickets and that there's no school tomorrow with wine. Very nice.
Talking about IKEA. I want to go there and buy swedish candy. You're never as swedish as when you're at IKEA. Oh the fooood!

( Meme time! )

Oh Yasu. I love you. Love love love you.
How can anyone ever say that the two of them are not completely married?
This months magazines are too much lovely! Subaru has no mustache in Potato, and in Wink Up there are absolutely lovely shots, and I will have to buy that magazine! This time around I haven't bought any mags, except for a few TV guides. It hurts. But I need to save money. But this one I just need!

I still don't know if I have won the ticket for the 13th. It bugs me. I should just mail Suzuki. But I fail at reading kanji and he will surely write loads that I don't understand. And he is always around everywhere at the guesthouse so I don't understand why I haven't seen him anywhere! The ticket for the 14th should arrive tomorrow though! ♥ Can't wait to know what seat I have!

But everything feels kind of really nice right now. I love this fandom so much. There is something special about eito fangirls. Just.. I don't know. Eito and Eighters are just made of love! ♥

And I get more and more excited about the school I found the other day. It would be so lovely if I would get in and be acting again in August. There is also a director- and writing course and a music course at the school and apparently the acting course does a lot of collaborations with those. It also seems important to try other ways of performing than just at the stage, and that is something I'd really like to do too. And there is a block were they do Commedia dell'arte which I have wanted to do ever since I first heard about it!
There seems to be four quite large productions during the year; An experimental absurd monologue performance and a collaboration with the directing and writing course, were they analyze and perform a play. These two are in the fall, then in the spring; To write and put on your own play where you chose your actors and collaborate with the music classes. And then the end production. . The writing your own play-thingie seems scary. But if there's nothing that seems scary and that I wonder if I can really pull off, then there is no reason to go to that school.
I want to go there so much!
The school is only one year old. I don't know if that's good or bad.
But oh. I so want to go! I get all excited just thinking about it! It sounds like the way of working there is really challenging and something I would grow very much as an actress doing.

I do have my back-up plan of going to Australia, but now I really want to go to that school! I'd be so disappointed if I don't get in. Hopefully the fact that it's such a new school puts some people off.
It seems like I will be living in the woods in the middle of nowhere if I get in. Quite a change from Tokyo. But I'll live. And so worth it for doing what I love.
I haven't really realized how much I actually miss acting until now. It is the best thing, ~~that and eito,~~ and I really want to work in the acting world in some kind of way.

Need to watch that TORN video thing from Okuras cons now. Looked very promising!

I get more and more excited about Kagotsurube. When I read this I squealed to myself for quite a while.
And Yasu seems to be working very hard with finding his character and I'm very much looking forward to watching it as a play rather than a Johnny's performance. And he can act that boy! I was really impressed by his skills in 818, because he was playing all these characters and they were all very distinctively different, as the same time as they was all a part of him. And I'm looking forward to seeing act in a more serious role.

And I realized how much I miss acting. There is so much I want to do. I'd love to once in my life be a part of a production of Tjechov's The Seagull, and I want to do Shakespeare, and I want to try different ways of acting, since what I've been working with is all the Stanislavskij method, which I do believe is a great, but I'd like to know more of the differences between different schools.
( Lj-cut for long thoughts on acting. )

Well. There was something else I wanted to write about. . .

Ah! I might or might not have a ticket for the con at the 13th too. A guy at the guesthouse who are bidding at the yahoo auctions for me, has not mailed or called to tell me what happened to the auction that ended tonight. >_< I really hope I won it! Pleeeeeaaaaase!

Been watching PoT again today. Didn't have time for any yesterday due to having to stay in my room in case the computer doctor would come. I did get down to cleaning my room, which was well needed, but I realize how addicted I am to PoT now, when I can barely stand one day without it!
And rumour has it that Heroes will start again Monday. Am thrilled!
Still need to watch ep 2-4 of Voice. Me and

luin_lote are planning to watch it together, but there are some Tennis princes interrupting that plan all the time.
Read lovely lovely Christmas-fic that

alissa recommended yesterday! ♥ ♥ ♥ The cuteness of Akutsu/Dan! ♥

Oh! Now I remember!

Get your own valentinr
Send me a Valentine's wish? ♥

Finally I downloaded the latest Can!Jani ep and will watch after I finished writing this. ♥ Finally! Been craving that damn ep so much, since half of my flist has called it the best ep so far!

How did the clock end up being 4PM?
Need to take a shower before I go to sleep too, cause I'll never get up in time for that tomorrow. -sighs-
Ok. Shower then Can!Jani or Can!Jani then shower? Oh why do the showers have to be on the bottom floor? Such a hassle to walk all those stairs! >_< ~~I am not being ridiculously whiny!~~

Anyways, now it's one week, or one week and a day, til I get to see Subaru again! ♥ Need to end with happy thought! ^___^v

EDIT: On a wim I started looking up acting schools and I found one that I find very very interesting, and if I understand everything right, there is still time to apply to the school. Oh my. Should I? Starting with acting again in August? If I'll get in of course. Not an audition either, just an interview. . . What to do? What the hell. I might as well apply and see if I get called to the interview.
EDIT2: I looked at my old schools homepage and realized there are pictures from our play! Ah! Nostalgic feeling!
And yes, I will apply for the school. It sounds so interesting! ♥

I've been having a lot of money-trouble lately, partly because I'm stupid and partly because I live in the land of Johnny's. I just can't help myself when I find things I want, leading to having spent all my money with one and a half month left here. Really smart Therese.

But! I have the best of friends who let me borrow money! THANKS AGAIN ILU! ^^ So, no more money-problems. But it still hurts that all the night bus-tickets to Osaka where sold out and I had to buy Shinkansen-ticket. Of 13 000 yen each. So, 26 000 for a day-trip to Osaka. YEEY! BUT! I'm going to see Kanjani again!!! IIIH! Probably as the worst seats I ever had on a Johnny's-concert, I'm too spoiled. But it doesn't matter cause we're going to see them!

AND! On top of that, I got a mail from my friend yesterday saying that if I wanted I could get a ticket as a birthday-gift to MIYAVIS concert this summer in Sweden! ILUILUILUILU! That is the BEST birthdaygift EVER!!!! Miyavi is the non\Johnny's japanese musician that I would most like to see. I got such a crush on him, eventhough my Johnny's-obsession has resulted in me not knowing as much as I would like about him. But anyways. I LOVE HIM and he's such a talented guitarist (spelling? ^^) and as if that wasn't enough he's also extremely beautiful. AND I'M GOING TO SEE HIM LIVE THIS SUMMER! That kinda at least makes me able to handle the fact that there's a summer tour with both Kanjani and KAT-TUN that I wont be able to see.

Oh lovely life and lovely friends! <3<3<3<3

And. I have to talk about Last Friends. It's now officially the best drama I've ever seen. And that is to say a lot considering that I just to be obsessed with dramas and that I still watch loads of them.
And it makes me happy that eventhough I don't catch everything, I can understand the most important parts without subtitles. Of course I watch the subtitled as soon as they are out, but yeah. It makes me happy! And today, when I was buying my extremely expensive shinkansen-tickets I did it with speaking only japanese! I'm proud of myself, cause I have a tendency to speak english eventhoug I can say what I need in japanese, just because I'm embarrassed and afraid to say things wrong. How stupid is that? And I did ask the lady at the ticketoffice if she spoke english today too, but she didn't. hoho. And well, I did get the wrong ticket at first, but that wasn't really my fault, she didn'l listen carefully enough. But oh well. I spoke in japanese. And made myself understood. I'm happy! ^__^

Oh. But back to Last Friends. The acting in that drama is just soooo good! I love that Sousuke isn't just portrayed like some kind of violent madman, but you can see why Michiru comes back to him. And oh, Michiru is kind of my dreamrole to play, and now I don't mean because it's Ryo as the DV-boyfriend. It's because that role would be so interesting to play. I would love to be in a play with that subject.
I've been talking a lot about acting lately. I miss it so much. And I miss the wonderful teachers at my school too. I wish that they had more actingclasses there, so I could go there again. I've never met such a person as Anna, our Icelandic teacher there. When she laughs she laughs with all of her body. She's so full of life. I want to be like her! And her classes. The days of just improvisations-classes. The magic of the whole class seeing and responsing to everyones actions and the concentration and connection between all of us. I miss that. And I miss the working with a play and trying to find oneselfes character. It's hard work, and it's difficult, but it's so worth all of the strange feelings and the tears that you go through. Eventhough I sometimes wondered why the hell I was doing all of that.

Oh well. My entries always gets longer than I intended. Probably because I can't focus on one thing for too long. ^^

Anyways! Kanjani tomorrow! YEEEY!

And I must just say one more thing. I REALLy appreciate the comments I get on my entries and I'm so sorry that I haven't responded lately. Please don't stop commenting, and I promise I will answer them this time. ^^;;

Oh. And one more thing, I'm currently writing on a fic that seems like it will actually be finished! ^^ Eventhough I kinda started on the beggining of the fic and then skipped that and jumped to fun part (Ryo tiing Kame up and doing loads of things to him), and it's not really well written, but I like the idea and I REALLY want to finish it. It's just that I really would need someone to grow through it and just, make it wellwritten. ^__^ But I like it anyways. But it's kinda embarassing to show it to people cause then they'll realize exactly how perverted my mind is. ^^

Ok. Now. I'm done with my babbling. ^^

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